Why do we complicate our lives so much?

A few minutes ago, I was finishing my day. While putting my younger daughter to bed, I had one of those “aha moments,” as I like to call them.

Suddenly, a very clear question popped into my mind:

Why do I complicate my life so much?

Just moments before, I had been caught in a spiral of frustration and self-demand.

The first day after school holidays can bring a little bit of chaos… and today was no exception.

Work felt heavy.

I didn’t exercise.

I didn’t write (which has become therapy for me!)

And to top it off… I didn’t manage to do the groceries and I’m missing the main ingredient for tomorrow’s dinner! (Yes — I’m one of those who even plans dinners ahead!)

And there I was, in the middle of a mental storm, when suddenly something inside me said:

“Are we all crazy? Or is it just me?”

And at the same time, I felt a wave of relief wash over me.

Because, really, none of the things I was worrying about were that serious.

• Tomorrow I can cook something else. I have plenty of food in the house.

• Work will balance itself once I catch up

• I can write now, if that’s what fills me up

• And if I want, I can wake up a bit earlier tomorrow to move my body

It felt like a part of me was whispering: “Laia, you don’t need to make things so complicated.”

When I told my husband about it, he laughed and said: “I’m glad you see it that way — it’s good for you, and it’s good for all of us.”

The inner perfectionist and the art of letting go

As an Enneagram Type 1, I have a tendency to wanting to do everything right, taking on more than I can handle, and not knowing how to delegate. I’m working on all of that.

And of course, when things don’t go as planned, my mind jumps into that loop of frustration and inner criticism.

But more and more often now, I notice that I have the opportunity to pause and observe — and to question my thoughts and my believes.

Those moments when I catch myself trapped in self-demand are, in reality, doorways to freedom.

Because in the end, many of the burdens I carry aren’t even mine. They’re inherited beliefs, expectations, and rigid ideas of what I “should” do or be.

And every time I realise that, I feel a little lighter.

From demand to awareness

Becoming aware of our own mental traps isn’t comfortable, but it’s deeply liberating.

For me, tools like the Enneagram and biodecoding have been incredibly helpful in “waking up” — they have supported me to better understand my motivations and where my reactions come from.

When I stop fighting with what “should be” and allow myself to simply be, life feels more serene.

Little by little, changing the way I choose to look at things also changes what happens around me.

It’s about pushing less, and flowing a little more.

A path I choose to share

This blog has become a therapeutic space for me — a place where I share my learnings, my reflections, and my small daily awakenings.

Where I dare to question inherited ideas I never thought to challenge before.

It’s also a dream come true at 42 (who would have thought!). In my mother tongue and in my adopted language, I’m trying to reach everyone around me.

And yes, I’m convinced that the Enneagram course I recently completed had a lot to do with this impulse to share and write.

Do you also find yourself complicating life without realising it?

I’d love to hear your experience💛

Laia